What to Expect in Your First Therapy Session

You finally book a therapy appointment. Then you start wondering what you’ll say. Do you explain what happened this week? Start with your childhood? What if you sit down and suddenly forget why you made the appointment?

“I’ve been thinking about coming for a while, and I don’t really know where to start” is a perfectly good first sentence. Your therapist can help you find a place to begin.

What happens at the beginning of the appointment?

Your therapist may spend a few minutes going over paperwork, explaining how sessions work, and discussing confidentiality and its limits. If you’re meeting online, you may also check that you have a private place to talk. This is a good time to ask about anything you read in the intake paperwork that you’d like explained.

Your therapist will likely ask some version of “What brings you in now?” You can answer with a recent example. Maybe you’ve felt anxious for years, but lately you’ve started dreading Sunday evenings because of what Monday feels like. Maybe you and your partner have had the same argument for months, and this time you couldn’t stop thinking about it. One example is enough to start a conversation.

What questions might your therapist ask?

Your therapist may ask how long the problem has been going on, how it affects your day, and what you’ve already tried. Depending on what brought you in, you might also talk about sleep, relationships, work, school, health, or previous experiences with therapy. Your therapist may ask about your safety as part of understanding what kind of support you need.

You may also be asked what you hope will change. “I want to get through my workday without replaying every conversation” is one possible answer. “I just know something needs to change” is another. You and your therapist can work together to put words to what you want from therapy.

How much do you have to share in the first session?

You can say when you’d like more time before talking about something. For example, “There’s some family history that probably matters, but I’d like to start with what’s happening at work.” That helps your therapist understand what feels most important and where you’re comfortable beginning.

If you’re worried you’ll draw a blank, jot down one thing that led you to book the appointment and one question you’d like to ask. You can read both from your phone if that makes it easier.

What can you ask your therapist?

The first appointment is also a chance to get a sense of how the therapist works. Here are a few questions you might ask.

• How do you usually work with someone who’s dealing with what I’ve described?

• What might we focus on in the first few sessions?

• How will we know if therapy is helping?

• How often would we meet, and what appointment times are available?

How do you know if the therapist is a good fit?

After the session, think about what it was like to talk with this person. Did you feel heard? Did their questions help you talk about what mattered? Did you feel comfortable correcting them or saying you needed a little more time?

A first appointment can leave you feeling relieved, tired, or still unsure. If you felt heard and want to see where the conversation goes, that can be enough to book a second session. If something felt off, you can bring it up at your next appointment or meet with another therapist.

Starting therapy at Daybreak Counseling Center

Daybreak Counseling Center offers in-person therapy in Long Beach and Cerritos and online therapy throughout California. When you reach out, tell us a little about what you’re looking for and what times work for you. If all you know right now is that you’d like someone to talk to, you can start there.